Thursday, June 30, 2011

Don't Stop Now by Julie Halpern

So a few weeks ago I posted a review about Julie Halpern's Don't Stop Now. In case you missed it, I will include it at the end of post.  It was a work of art.

So Julie has decided to share with us what types of things she might find at a garage sale of her teen years.  Just a warning, she is quirky and hilarious.

Teenage Garage Sale - What types of things might we find at a garage sale in your teen years? You can just share memories, assign them values, any way you'd like to do it!

I would never have parted with any of these things as a teen. Now? I have no idea where any of these things are.:
• A really ugly Young Ones t-shirt with yellow armpits
• Pictures of Bono cut out from various magazines.
• A British flag from my bedroom door.
• The typewriter where I typed perverted stories for my friends.
• Buttondowns of my dad’s that I used to borrow.
• An Eddie Vedder autograph from Lollapalooza.
• Videotapes of “Don’t Just Sit There,” the Nickelodeon show
• Journals written in pencil which are completely illegible now.

ctions, that no matter what, lead us to somewhere." Huh. That would have been a really nice place to end this review. Alas, I have more.

"I hate brushing my teeth in a public sink. Spitting. Blow-drying my face when there are no paper towels." Deep.

""She told me I was a really good friend,' I say, staring ahead at the buffet, the cornucopia of foods blurring into a flavored rainbow.

'Bit**,' Josh chides. 'How dare she?' He talks through the cake bits in his mouth."

"Can you imagine" - Josh saunters up next to me to marvel at the town that once was - "the streets of Deadwood? No law. A six-shooter on your belt and a prostitute on your arm?" Josh looks whimsical, as if he's reliving his past life's glory days.

"So we drive toward the sunset, windows down; Elvis reruns fill the air. We drive as the stars bloom on the vast fabric of navy sky, passing miles of nothing, as bugs can't help but throw themselves at our windshield."

If you want a deep, complicated, and filled with angst protagonist, keep walking. This isn't the book you want to read. If you want to like the protagonist because she is clever, intelligent, witty, and so is her side-kick, highly recommend it.

Parental warning:

Language and swearing: Moderate. Usual farm words and a couple of diety.

Further language: Moderate. Josh is a little on the crass side, although not excessively so, he's a boy who talks potty talk.

Sex: If I shared that part, I might ruin the conflict resolution. But if sex does occur, it would only complicate the conflict. If sex does occur, it is not explicitly described.

Content: There is a reason Penny has run away. Slight spoiler *Gavin is physically abusive*

Overall feeling at the end of the book? Satisfied, light in spirit, I want to be Julie Hapern's electronic BFF so we can email clever prose to one another.

And now, for your entertainment, I present highlights from Josh and Lil's Quirky Adventure:

Wonder of the Plains
It's a corn palace. Made out of corn.

So there's a whole museum full of these creepy dolls.  All sizes. All shapes. All creeps.

House on the Rock: Carousel Room 3
This garrish carousel is tiered and protected by angels. When I say "angels," I really mean store mannequins lovingly dressed up as heavenly hosts. Creep Factor somewhere in the Doll Museum and Bride of Chucky.

Badlands Scenery
The Badlands. Haven't you always wondered?

Inferno Cone
Craters of the Moon. An actual national park made out of lava rock.
I was underwhelmed, too.
I'll take Hawaii, thankyouverymuch.

Old Faithful Geyser Photos
Old Faithful.

Kevin Costner's signature, "Deadwood."
It's all Hollywood magic. Nothing of interest is really here.

Portland's secret coffee shop. This one is amusing. This is just the bathroom.  Apparently, there are tables that shrink and grow, slide into the wall, etc.

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